Så bra! Chuck Norris facts

1. If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you
2. There is no 'ctrl' button on Chuck Norris's computer. Chuck Norris is always in control.
3. Apple pays Chuck Norris 99 cents every time he listens to a song.
4. Chuck Norris is suing Myspace for taking the name of what he calls everything around you.
5. Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because he only recognizes the element of surprise.
6. Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
7. Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
8. There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.
9. Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris.
10. Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
11. Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
12. There is no chin behind Chuck Norris’ beard. There is only another fist.
    When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down.
13. Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.
14. Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.
15. Chuck Norris does not get frostbite. Chuck Norris bites frost